(Moogle of Death)
NOTE from author: Sorry all for the chopping and changing of the status of this story, it’s finished now so there’ll be no more confusion. Thanks especially to Cubedcinder for the support he’s given and thanks to everyone who’s read the story.
It was a day like any other for Tidus as he floated on his back in the shimmering water around Besaid Island. He was reflecting on his previous advances on Yuna and was wondering where they went wrong. His peace was disturbed as Rikku came running up to the shoreline. She started shouting something in Al Bhed. Tidus righted himself in the water and looked with casual interest to what she was shouting at. It was an Al Bhed ship. It’s hull made slight waves in the otherwise still waters and Tidus swam over to Rikku.
“What’s going on? What’s this ship doing here, you know Wakka wont like this.” he said to the young Al Bhed.
“Nuts to Wakka, they’re asking me and some companions to go on an excavation in the Temple of Furnus, I can only bring two though because there isn’t enough supplies for more people.” This was the perfect chance for Tidus to further his relationship with Yuna, by showing how willing he is to help. “I’ll go see if Yuna will come with us” he said finally.
“So you’re going then?” Rikku asked.
“You got it!” Tidus replied with his trademark confidence.
“All right!” an equally excited Rikku responded.
The pair ran towards the village battling the occasional fiend, then they saw a blinding flash from the direction of Besaid village. The two simply looked at each other and quickened their pace. When they arrived at the village they looked around for any signs of destruction, they found none. What they did find was Yuna standing in the main area of the village, the place where she summoned her first aeon. The two approached the young summoner.
“We saw a flash, what happened Yuna?” asked Tidus.
“I was just practicing my summoning,” she explained, “I was trying to do a fusion summon which is pretty advanced stuff, it didn’t quite work though. I tried to fuse Ifrit with Bahamut to make a fire dragon but look what I got.”
All eyes fell on a small dragon, about the size of a dog that was breathing smoke.
“It doesn’t exactly fill me with terror, that’s for sure!” Tidus joked. Yuna joined in. The two were laughing away when Rikku cleared her throat.
“Ahem, aren’t you forgetting something Tidus?” she asked with a look of mild annoyance on her face.
“Oh yeah. Hey Yuna, me and Rikku were gonna explore some ruins and we want you to come with us! So what do you say?”
Yuna looked thoughtful, she wanted to go but she had this overpowering feeling that something was going to happen. She brushed this feeling aside as her desire to go was much stronger than any silly premonitions.
“Fine, I’ll go, just let me get Kimhari then.” she said.
“Nononononononono you don’t!” exclaimed Rikku, “there’s barely enough food as it is without that big guy snarfing it all down!”
“But Kimhari has been my guardian since...” Yuna began, she was cut off by Rikku
“Yeah yeah, we’ve heard this story before, just come on willya!” Rikku grabbed her arm and began to drag her towards the ship.
“You....already....said....yes....so......come on!” Rikku said between grunts of effort, summoners are heavier than they look!
Later that day they set off for the temple of Furnus. Which was very much like the temple Tidus and Rikku met at. It was half submerged in the water and had this eerie silence about it.
“What is it we’re looking for anyway?” Tidus asked leaning over the railing on the boat, looking at the calm sea.
“It’s a Machina! One that we haven’t seen before, it’s said to have seeecret pooowers!” Rikku giggled, trying to make it sound mysterious while doing magic casting gestures with her hands.
“Powers? Like what?” Tidus asked.
“You know, I don’t know, that’s why we’ve to find it. Ah we’re here!” She then shouted something in Al Bhed to the navigator, the anchor was dropped and the three party members were driven over to an island with a small door in it.
“Well here we are, at the temple of Furnus, that looks like the entrance over there. Come on let’s go!” said Rikku. The three adventurers went up to the door of the temple and looked at the carvings on the walls.
“Rikku, what do these carvings say?” asked Yuna. Rikku looked thoughtfully at the carvings, tilted her head slightly with her chin resting on her fist, after about 5 minutes she looked at Yuna and shrugged.
“Your guess is as good as mine.” she said.
The group pressed on, and entered the temple, as they did they noticed a lot of carvings similar to the ones at the entrance but thought no more of them. When they were well inside the temple and near what they thought was the centre Rikku stopped the group in at a three way intersection in the stone passage.
“Hey, we can probably save some time and cover more ground if we split up, whaddya say?” she said.
“Ok!” both Tidus and Yuna said in perfect unison.
Rikku began to run down the left passage, Yuna walked down the middle and Tidus was left to go right. As Tidus walked down the passage he couldn’t shake this feeling that something bad was about to happen.
These thoughts were quickly lifted as he found this large door with some Al Bhed on it, in his pidgin Al Bhed he made out the words “Danger” and “Security” .
“Must just be to scare people, and anyway I can handle any Machina so I’ll be OK against security bots.”, he thought.
As he opened the door, he saw a bright purplish blue beam aimed straight at his chest. It smacked him squarely and knocked him off his feet. He was knocked unconscious for quite a while. When he woke he began to look around, his vision was still a bit blurry, he sat down to regain his senses he hard a large thudding.... he looked in the general direction and almost screamed as he saw Yuna and Rikku. They were enormous!
“Well, Tidus isn’t stupid enough to enter here without deactivating the security device, he probably read the notice and went off to find the console or something. Lets wait here for him.” Rikku said. The normally tranquil sounds of her voice was now like booming thunder to Tidus. He hypothesised that the security device must have been a miniaturization ray or something, that meant that Rikku and Yuna weren’t huge, he was tiny, around half an inch tall to be precise.
Rikku and Yuna sat down and waited, where could Tidus be?
Tidus was in luck, the girls were sitting down, he had to get their attention, Rikku could fix it with some Al Bhed know-how or Yuna could purify him or something. He walked over to them and started shouting “HEY!!! HEY!! DOWN HERE!! RIKKU! YUNA!!! I’M DOWN HERE!” although this didn’t have the desired effect. He then decided for a more direct approach. He walked up to Yuna’s huge boot and started pounding on the side of it. Again this had very little effect and only served to tire Tidus out. He sat down plotting his next move.
“I’m gonna go and try and find out what this is”, Rikku said indicating the Machina that was at the centre of the room,” but I left my tools in the security room, so I’ll go get them and see if I can see Tidus at the same time, you just stay here in case he appears.”
“Ok, don’t be long” Yuna said. With that Rikku left the room in search of her tools and Tidus.
Tidus was starting to worry, what if they left without him? He decided, there was no other choice, he had to get Yuna’s attention before she got up to look for him. He summoned all his strength and launched himself at her boot, trying to climb on top of it, but the leather was so smooth that it was impossible to get a good handhold on it. Eventually though, he had managed to get a purchase on a slight imperfection on the surface and was up on top of the boot. He sat and thought, he couldn’t sit here too long because Yuna might tap her foot, or walk or something and all his hard work would be for naught.
Then it struck him, he could climb her dress. He immediately leaped and grabbed on to the bottom of her dress and pondered whether to go on the inside, or the outside. If he went the inside she couldn’t brush him off easily but he could get stuck against her if she moved her clothes in a certain way, if he went on the outside it would be easier to be knocked off but, on the other hand, he may be seen, and saved so it was 50/50. Discovery was his main priority and being discovered inside her dress may make Yuna angry so, the outside it was.
He began his monumental climb and had got to about her stomach region when he had reached a problem. Luckily Yuna had been still, probably meditating, or praying or something like that, but the problem was, how was he going to climb her breasts? The only solution Tidus saw was to climb up her side or back, but then he was in real danger of being hit by her arms...
Of course! If he could jump on to her hand she would see him! He saw her practicing her prayer so when she brought her hands close to her chest, he leapt for all he was worth...
... and landed on the palm of her hand.
Yuna must’ve felt this because he was being lifted at tremendous peed towards her face. She simply looked and whispered at him.
“Tidus, is that you?”
“Well, it sure aint the Easter bunny!” Tidus replied.
“This isn’t exactly the time for jokes don’t you think?” she said sternly.
“Who are you talking to?” said Rikku as she walked through the door.
Yuna panicked, she then pretended she was yawning and dropped Tidus in her mouth. She hoped he would be OK.
Tidus hoped he would be OK, he was in the hot, wet mouth of Yuna, he glanced around his strange location and noticed the very dangerous looking white teeth, glimmering with saliva. The tongue he was sitting on was warm and slightly bumpy. Tidus didn’t want to risk looking round to the large gaping hole he knew was there. He just prayed to Yevon that Yuna didn’t swallow by accident.
Yuna could feel her guardian on her tongue, she then decided to hold him against her cheek while she talked to Rikku.
“So did you see Tidus come by?” Rikku asked.
“Yeah” Yuna replied, “in fact he’s still here”.
Rikku looked confused, she began glancing across the room, she saw no sign of Tidus.
“Uh, Yunie? You been drinking Auron’s ‘Special Medicine’? Tidus isn’t here!” Rikku said slightly confused.
With this Yuna positioned the now soaked Tidus and stuck her tongue out to show Rikku.
“Is that? How did he... Why is he so small? And why is he in your mouth?” Rikku asked.
“Well, he appeared on my hand this size and when you came in the door I did the first thing that came to mind, and that’s why he was in my mouth.” Yuna explained.
“Ok, that’s really strange, but this is good as it tells us what this device is! It’s a miniaturisation ray! If you give me enough time I’ll reverse the polarities and make it a growth ray, then we can change Tidus back to normal.”
Tidus, who by now was standing on Yuna’s palm again, started jumping about in celebration.
“Yunie, you can’t carry him in your hand like that, you wont be able to cast spells, summon or use your weapon with one hand. Do you have any pockets?” Rikku asked.
“No, this dress is pretty impractical, holding him in my mouth would be dangerous as well, I may forget about him and swallow.”
Tidus shuddered at the thought.
“Oh well, pass him here, I have a few pockets that I have spare.” Rikku said, holding her hand out.
Yuna dropped Tidus onto Rikku’s hand, Tidus felt a little worried, Yuna was kind and good and Rikku, was well, not the most gentle of the group, she can be very excitable.
“Ok Tidus, you’ll be safe here!” Rikku said and began to open her back pocket. Tidus started to complain.
“What if you sit down when I’m in there? I’ll be crushed!” he exclaimed.
“You saying my butt is big?” Rikku said jokingly. She dropped him in giggling.
Tidus landed with a small thud in the warm darkness. The pocket snapped back and Tidus’ world became a little tighter. Luckily it was soft so he wasn’t in any real pain. When Rikku began walking Tidus was bounced about each wall of the pocket and eventually, in his warm surroundings, he lost consciousness.
When Tidus awoke he was in a hut of some sort, he was still small which was a bad thing of course, but he could tell by the tranquillity in the air that he was off that god forsaken boat, he was in Besaid again. At least he knew where he was. Nothing good has ever happened whenever he goes on a boat with Rikku he mused.
He looked around, he seemed to be on his own. He thought briefly of going exploring but he remembered that a lot of the villagers let their dogs roam about freely, that would be a bad thing. Also, by the amount of noise outside, it was market day so he was in danger of being trampled. Yes, staying put would be the most health-conscious thing to do.
He wasn’t alone for long, Rikku came in. She spied him sitting on the table.
“Hey Tidus, hows it going?” she asked.
Tidus thought this was a really stupid question.
“Oh just great! I couldn’t be better!” he shouted, his throat was kind of sore from all the shouting he was doing before.
“Good, you wont mind me telling you that the machina is going to take longer than I thought to fix then, will you?” she was obviously ignoring his sarcasm.
“What?! What am I supposed to do till then? Yuna and Wakka are probably preparing for the festival and you’ll be working on the machina!” he exclaimed.
“Oh don’t worry, I found someone to look after you. Here she comes now.”
Tidus felt the blood drain from his body, not Lulu! She wasn’t exactly his best friend (please bear in mind this is near the start of the story where Lulu wasn’t very trustful of Tidus) and she looked like she could do all kinds of things to him in his helpless form.
She walked in and glared at Tidus, he looked really nervous, she was really intimidating after all.
“Ok, well I’ll leave you two to yourselves then!” Rikku said as she left.
“No Rikku!” Tidus said, but it fell upon deaf ears as she left and closed the door, leaving just him and Lulu.
“Well well, what do we have here? A teeny tiny guardian? Not much use now are you?” Lulu said, humiliating Tidus further.
“Please, don’t hurt me!” Tidus begged, he was fearing for his life.
“I’m offended! You actually think I would hurt another human being? You don’t trust me?” Lulu was getting angry, she sighed “Wakka was right, I do have a bad temper, I’m sorry Tidus, I’m not going to hurt you. The truth is...”
Then she did something Tidus never expected. She reached for him, grabbed his unresisting body brought her up to her mouth and gave him the biggest kiss he’d ever had. Her soft lips felt nice on his body, her breath was fresh too. Tidus felt bad, he liked Yuna, not Lulu, but if he told Lulu that she would surely get angry again. He could either go along with this and feel like he was cheating on Yuna, or he could get smooshed into paste by this short-tempered giantess. Tough call really, he could always try and negotiate with Lulu but this could also lead to him becoming a decoration on the walls.
Tidus began to push away at her lips. Lulu felt this and looked down upon him. She spoke calmly.
“You have one minute to explain why you did that.”
“Lulu, I didn’t know you felt this way about me, I know I can be a bit of a jerk sometimes but I didn’t deserve to be humiliated. You are beautiful and despite your rough exterior I bet you’ve a heart of gold and all, but my feelings belong to Yuna. I can understand if you want to hurt me now, but please, think how this will affect Yuna.” Tidus said.
“I could just make up some story about how you were going to emotionally abuse her, use her fame for your own gain. I think she may be more inclined to believe me if I act all weepy.” Lulu said with anger flaring in her eyes.
“You could, but it wouldn’t work.” Tidus replied with a grin.
“Oh and why’s that, my miniature friend? In fact, I’ll take care of you just now! Yeah I’ll put you on the ground and step on you like the bug you are!” she started to shout.
Tidus just shot her a grin and said “You’ll do nothing of the sort.”
Lulu was really losing it now.
“How can you stay so calm in the face of certain, and extremely painful, death?!?” she exclaimed.
“Because Yuna and Rikku have been standing behind you the whole time.” he replied with a laugh.
Now it was Lulu’s turn to fear for her life. She spun round slowly on her heel and sure enough, her adopted sister and her guardian were standing in the doorway.
Lulu began to apologise...
“Yuna, I’m sorry, I let this thing go to my head, and he just rubbed me up the wrong way and...”
She was cut-off.
“I understand Lulu. I know you have a bad temper and that Tidus gets your goat, so to speak. Were you really gonna squish him?” replied Yuna in her ever-forgiving voice.
“No, just scare him a bit, unless he REALLY ticked me off” she replied and stamped her footat Tidus, who gulped audibly.
Rikku then spoke.
“All hail me, the mistress of machina! For I have fixed the size gun thingy.” she danced about as she said this.
“I thought you said it would take a while to fix?” asked Tidus.
Rikku then got a bit embarrassed.
“Ok well MAYBE I forgot to check the batteries were charged, but it works now so stand over there Tidus and we’ll grow ya back to normal.”
Tidus didn’t need telling twice. He hopped off Lulu’s hand, which was lowered to the ground and ran towards the far end of the room. It took quite a while in his shrunken state but in a few minutes he got to the far wall.
Rikku fired the beam at him and he instantly felt warmth fill his body. He began to see the objects in the room get smaller, no, he was getting bigger. He felt slightly dizzy as he neared his original height but stayed standing. He closed his eyes for the last few seconds...
...and opened them. He was back to normal! Everyone was normal again and he was his own size. He ran around the room hugging everyone, even Lulu to show there were no hard feelings. He looked over to Yuna who had her mouth wide open in shock, and then at Rikku who was giggling madly.
“What’s the matter ladies?” he said.
“Uh Tidus? You may wanna get some clothes on?” said Rikku with as straight a face as she could muster.
Tidus looked down, and there, at his feet, was his Zanarkand Abes outfit, ripped to shreds and about as big as his thumbnail. Luckily he was in Wakka’s hut so he quickly grabbed a Besaid Auroch outfit from the wardrobe. It was a tad baggy but it fitted him well enough.
When he was decent, Tidus spoke.
“Well Rikku, I think there was a reason that thing was locked up in a temple, it’s dangerous. We should put it back.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right, but for now PAR-TAY!” she said and raised her hand.
They all laughed and left the hut. Rikku left the ray on a table near the door and went to join the others. Lulu picked up the gun, and grinned.